Monday, January 14, 2008

The Hunt

I am looking for a job.

The Fear.

The Terror.

The Despair.

Broke A$ Fuck is what we are.

Yesterday we recorded a bunch of shit in HD for me to send out to potential employers. I hope someone likes what I have to offer. It is really scary putting yourself out there. Standing in the face of fear, not making the rent, defeat.

I used to have the world by the balls...and now I have a lot of potential still...but this stagnation is taking away from it. Once you have a taste of what power feels like...and then lose it...the world gets turned upside down. That is the primary causation of my breakdown. The fact that I went from someone to nobody literally overnight. BOGUS.

But taking that shit in strides is part of it. I am going to get a job that isn't totally enthralling...but is something. I want to go back to school...but need to return to zero first. I decided to just go with the flow. Accept my situation and rock out with my figurative cock out. That is all you can do at times like this.

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