You were in a vision. It was tropical, the air thick and the scenery absolutely gorgeous. There were giant fuscia and tangerine flowers blooming that contrasted beautifully against the lush green backdrop. We were meeting in secret about something. It wasn't clear what exactly. Others were gathered with us in a circle. There was a magnificent energy--almost an electricity in the air. All the blooms gave a sweet quality to the warm, heavy air. I tried to absorb all details knowing my stay here would be short. Though, feeling it in my heart and soul that this was not the first nor the last time I would see these strikingly familiar faces or enchanted landscape. I awoke.

NLP

The past 72 hours have been some of the most intense times of my life.

Mental fatigue--Information overload.

Once I regain "normal" cognitive function, Ill elaborate. My brain is starting to work in ways I never imagined possible. Nor have felt in a very long time. Never underestimate the power of auto-suggestion.

Chris Howard "Designing Your Destiny:" Day 1

Today was my first day of Chris Howard's seminar, "Designing Your Destiny." I must admit, it was a little bit different than I initially anticipated.

I walk into a foyer at the Hilton in Universal City to find a large population of older people (including one lady rocking out a moo-moo). This rather uncomfortable situation posed a rather interesting position for me. I was looking around to see my friend Barham (my friend that offered me the $5,000 ticket to this seminar), but couldn't find him in the rather unusual group of characters. Now, don't get me wrong: I thought some of these people were pretty cool. But, while waiting in the second line to register as a guest (a rather annoying scenario trying to find my way to the sign up)...I had SEVERAL people cut me in line. Given the content presented in these seminars, I was rather taken aback by the previously mentioned rude behavior. You'd imagine a room full of life coaches would understand how to wait in line. It was moderately shocking to see that they did not.

Anyway, after passing through what seemed like the gates of hell (perhaps it was my lack of glucose that shaped my perspective), I finally entered into a candle lit room. Now, I am not going to lie to you saying that all of this excited me. I would say that the moments that passed over the previous few days were full of more excitement and anticipation than when I entered the conference. I was there for a reason so I consciously decided to make the best of the day regardless of the fact that I thought this entire seminar seemed like bullshit.

It took me a good 3 hours to get into what the class instructor was saying. In all honesty, there was so much information being thrust at me I really can't even recall any details in the lessons. Good thing I have a 200 page guide book to refer back to! ;) Back on point--There were lots of hugs, congratulations, hypnosis, letting go, absurdities, visualization, etc. that we went over today. I learned how to decode my dreams. People were crying. Imagine gospel church meets self-help. We laid out our "Bullshit Story" of limitations, made a complete mockery of it and let it go by ripping the very paper it was written on and throwing it as the confetti to enhance our celebration of new found personal freedom.

I was guided through stories of what inspires me in both my professional and personal realms. I learned the two different worlds that I was living in and how I had to make the conscious decision to life in one or the other.

I was hypnotized into this transe where I saw my own destiny if I didn't live out my passion and my dreams versus the realm where I did.

I have no idea how to describe what I went through--Perhaps this illocial rampage will make a bit more sense after tomorrow's seminar. All I know right now is everything I once thought and believed was all my perception of my own reality. Now that I have broken though the boundaries that I placed on myself, my potential is much greater than I ever imagined. I went from being in a closed box to this entity of everything and nothing all at the same time. I can feel in my heart of hearts that something happened--There was a definite change in who I am now and who I was this morning. I am just not sure what happened or how I am going to move into action.

Until tomorrow...

A personal liberation struggle.

Rather than gossip, spit hate, spite and negativity. I will remain unaffected. Thank you Andy.

If death is the worst thing that can happen to me...and I don't fear death...Than I cannot fear what happens to me in life.

Round 2 of Book 7

TO LOVE LOVE; TO HATE HATE.

4 days of illness. Pretty sure at points--I lost my mind.


CHICAGO=Jobs don't define you.
LA=money does not equal one's value.

Centered. On the verge of insanity. Full of love, hope and understanding.

bangin'

Jesus Saves.

http://www.zeitgeistmovie.com/

Changes

Today signifies the first day that I am back on track to get hot again. Eating shitty food, as much as I want, whenever I want is nice and all. But, nobody is going to want to train with someone who doesn't look like they know what they are doing. So, I am going to push forward, hardcore. I will not stop my diet/exercise routine until I have a six-pack. It is going to be kind of extreme...but I am not necessarily someone who backs down very easily. It is going to take a lot of pushing and mental strength. I am not worried. I got this.

Also, after reading a friend's blog who moved to New York the same week I moved to LA I had a realization that I really haven't done anything in Los Angeles. I have spent a lot of time in the same places: Valencia, Burbank, West Hollywood, Beverly Hills. I am in love with the ocean and I cannot even remember the last time that I went to the beach. That was one of the positives of working for myself...the fact that I could work from literally anywhere. I find myself sitting in a dark apartment working alongside Julian. I want to see and explore. There is a lot of culture here in Los Angeles. I need to experience it. I don't want to order Chinese from a block away...I want to go to china town. I want to eat exotic foods in diverse neighborhoods. I swear...I've pretty much only encountered white people thus far. I need to run down shitty streets at night. I need to have random conversations with strangers. I need to talk to homeless people. Life is all about the experience and somehow this got lost in translation.

I pray to whomever is running this show that I get my money back from wamu. I need to buy a bike. I think that you experience the world in a completely different way while your own power moves you though the streets. You get to experience the world from a first person standpoint. There is no further separation from what is actually going on. Getting back on those two wheels is going to be intense here. Especially, given the sheer amount of traffic and shitty driving, in conjunction with hills and my current lack of cardiovascular endurance. Whatever. It will be hard at first, it always is. I just have to push through and the love I used to have with my man-powered machine will fill my heart and soul again. God, I miss the wind blowing my bandanna-ed up pony tail. Maybe I'll even get a basket for the dog...

Its a new month. This past September was the worst yet. But, its all up from here. Its fall--A season of change. I welcome whatever the cool breezes will bring. Hopefully new clients, new opportunities and travel. Its been over a year since I have had a legit vacation. That is entirely too long.

Oh, and I am thinking an excellent way to network is voulenteering. People that volunteers usually have some cash. So, if I become friends with them I bet that I can gain a lot of clients that way. Ill keep you posted.

With Love...

xo