Passions:

Love
Family
The Universe
Learning
Thinking
Communication
Risk
Reward
Entrepreneurship
Perception
Facts
Travel
Motivating Myself
Motivating Others
Being Passionate
Assisting in Individuals Pursuit of their Passion
Making People Laugh/Smile
Laughing/Smiling
Engaging in Intellectual Conversations
Discussing Philosophy
Discussing American Public Policies
Economics
Taking to Strangers
Awkwardness
Running
Biking
Reading
Lifting
Yoga
Starting Shit
Fresh Fruit
Eating Protein
Puppies
The Ocean
Good Red Wine
Nice Tea
Sunsets
Thunderstorms in the Summer
Frozen Yogurt
Stars on a Clear Night
Art-Any Medium
The Color Gold
Tropical Climates

A message from the future.

A while back in my journey through life I found myself at a fork in the road: I had a passion for helping people achieve their goals yet, entering into the new-age self-help industry is very difficult and intimidating at any age…let alone when you are a young pup. I knew that I had experienced some low lows and great triumphs. I knew that I had the knowledge and experience to help others achieve their goals. I just didn’t know how to turn this innate passion into a career. I was so scared to take the risk of doing what makes me happy due to great short-term sacrifice, potential failure and monetary loss. I kept up with my studies in motivational and inspirational literature, philosophy along with engaging in goal-oriented conversations. I was continuously enthralled with mulling over potential outcomes of starting my own coaching business, writing lists of the steps necessary to set up a fully-functional firm and even asking for other’s advice and approval about my decision. I was constantly making excesses to myself as to why I could not start the project. I was a victim of fear—fear of the unknown.

One day I experienced this epiphany—The first step is the hardest. I have told this philosophy of thought to many individuals—yet, was having this great difficulty actually implementing the advice in my own life. Once you start a project…the momentum builds and you realize its hard work…but you can do it! I learned that nothing worth having is going to come easy, but the fruits of your own blood, sweat and tears are sweet. All you can do is set goals and accomplish them with confidence. Hard work always pays off, even if there is a little bit of a delay. When you are discouraged, keep your head up and keep going. When you think that you cannot go any further…take another step. It is usually that last ditch effort that will be your key to success. As illustrated by you reading this story, things do work out if you are persistent in your efforts and never lose sight of what your goals and dreams are.

Endurance.

I am not sure why I am sooooo into posting pictures of my facial expressions up here. There are a multitude of different looks. Perhaps if you know me...the mood of the post will make a little more sense. Like video..but easier.

Regardless, I have been into these videos (for no particular reason). Perhaps it is just the mood of my life right now.

Today I had my final interview for the position I am applying for in SanFran. My brother just called me explaining how he is apparently getting married. For his allowance...He has offered to pay nearly half of my rent if I was to move to LA. Plus, I still have the credit on Airitalia that I need to use by the first of May. Oh, the places you'll go.

I found Cubs tickets on Sunday. Though, didn't use/sell them. Some moral issue that I can't seem to explain. Also, a rep from the Chicago Fire hooked it up with a couple of tickets to their home opener for tomorrow (or today I guess). I took them and gave em' to one of my co-workers who wanted to take his son. Hopefully they get the chance to go.

Not that I do things with the intent of getting anything in return...but, fuck. I am not a bad person. I am really tired of getting fucked.

Today at work...I was excluded from several conversations as usual. I am tired of people disliking me for no valid reason. I am nice to everyone. I am not out to get anyone. There is enough success for all. I just don't get it. Life isn't fair...I get that. I have worked hard and have a few good friends (which I cannot even express in words how thankful I am that they are in my life) and a good family. Dysfunctional at times...but, kind hearted...and understanding. I need something more. Perhaps a bit of financial security and some travel. I don't want things...I want expereinces. I guess this one of them...but fuck. Isn't it over yet?

Anyway...these are some things for you to check out. Send me more. I want to see what touches you.

Enjoy.

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=V3Kd7IGPyeg

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=CPoI5gWhC6w

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=g8Z1MpcyqQU

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=8gLWTtlMwo4

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=IDzl6ZQpSOo

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=oP5J4W5GQ3w

late.

<3

He is the man for me. Unconditional love for 9 solid years.

site.

Clarity.

As the previous post states...Yesterday I was running around getting beer for ungrateful bastards when all of a sudden I had this moment of clarity. It was the coalescence of everything that I have consciously chosen to be thrust upon me. I hated my life. Then I felt this overwhelming feeling of all control being lost.

I had an interview at Fox Networks yesterday morning...and tried...but, didn't really try. The shitty, stuffy, slacks wearing, cubicle-ridden atmosphere was a wonderful reminder of what I didn't want to be doing with my life. A job that most young media pups like myself would kill for...and here I am not really feeling it.

So now what?

I hate the career path that I had "chosen" and I hate waiting tables. My schedule was cut down to 3 days/week. Which is cool...but I am in love with having a fat savings account. I feel this weight on my chest. A weight I haven't felt in months. "Fuck, what do I do?"

At this precise moment in time I have a revelation, the exact revelation that I was banking on happening given my strategic situation: FUCK THIS.

I realize that the entry level job I will inevitably hate (creating excel spreadsheets, making powerpoints, etc.) along with being a server isn't the end all of my life. Its actually shit I hate doing...So, given my work ethic, persistence, network and passion...why am I doing this? Why am I hating my life for a shitty job? Who says I have to start at the bottom? Society? Who says I need to work for a big company or have an MBA to become "someone." Fuck that noise. I am someone...I am Katie FUCKING N..." (if you personally know me...you'll know that).

So, my plan worked. Placing myself in an absolutely SHIT PLACE with no options out has forced me to gain this desire to succeed on my own. I've got world's balls in my hands as we speak. And do you know why? Because I think so. And as simple as it is...that is all it takes.

What is reality anyway? Whatever the fuck you want it to be...that's what.

And so my next chapter begins.

This is me a few minutes ago after a long night of beerwenching. RAW.

My life doesn't suck. I am complacent and unmotivated. Its fucking true. After getting pushed around, having had my ass grabbed numerous times and then degraded like I can't fucking hit a button on a computer and carry a drink...I have decided that the reason I feel so shitty is because I am not moving forward.*

Buttttt, I am about to pass out. I'll write more in the AM. TBC...